BRC Ultra Border Crawl IX – 10/6 – 6:00AM – 36.9 Miles of Everything
Hey. Anyone want to go for a long run on Saturday? No? How about if you get to go slow? Will that help?
We’re looking at the ninth edition of this bad idea. But it’s only a bad idea if people show up so I’m going to spend the rest of this email convincing you this particular bad idea is the best use of your Saturday morning. If this email doesn’t convince you, then I’m out of ideas.
I’ll send out the intricate logistic details in another email where we can discuss Pringles and PBJs and Motrin. But this is not the time for such formality. Today, I have to tell you a secret; it’s the secret to finishing the Ultra Border Crawl. It’s all in the pace. Allow me to explain:
Go slow. Run for a long time.
Got it?
No? OK, I wrote a song about it. Wanna hear it?
First you need to warm up. Don’t attempt this one cold . Hit this site first before reading further. You may want to leave it running when you move on below. Take your time. There’s a lot to unpack here. And we’ll talk again on Friday and I’ll see you out there Saturday morning.
[cue music]
Blame it all on the booze
I had weight to lose
And slowed down your beach bound affair
Not fast on the go
Not fast, now you know
I was the last one
Who should have been there
And I saw the surprise
And the fear in your eyes
When I showed fatigue and some pain
Then blew on leg two
Might be the worst I’ve been through
But you’ll never hear me complain
‘Cause I’ve got friends with slow paces
Who do Fireball shots
And some beer chasers while still underway
And we’re still okay
I’m not fast in longer races
Think I’ll never do those steeplechases
Oh, I’ve got friends with slow paces
Well, I guess I was wrong
I shouldn’t run long
Even though I’ve been there before
Then nothing went right
Got worse overnight
And I still had to go run some more
Hey, I didn’t mean
To cause a big scene
Just give me three hours and then
Well, I’ll get out of
As that stinky-ass van
That we’re livin’ in
‘Cause I’ve got friends with slow paces
Who do Fireball shots
And some beer chasers while still underway
And we’re still okay
I’m not fast in longer races
Think I’ll never do those steeplechases
Oh, I’ve got friends with slow paces
Well, I might have been wrong
Although, I ran long
Just not like I did it before
Almost nothing went right
It went on all night
Until I couldn’t run anymore
I didn’t mean to cause a big scene
And I sure don’t mean to be crass
I go slow, but I go
I’ll get back on the road
And you can kiss my ass
‘Cause I’ve got friends with slow paces
Who do Fireball shots
And some beer chasers while still underway
And we’re still okay
I’m not fast in longer races
Think I’ll never do those steeplechases
Oh, I’ve got friends with slow paces